Humor, Photography etc.

Timothy D. Naegele

What follows are items of humor, photographs that I believe are exceptional, and other items that you might find interesting.  I hope you do.

 

 

16 responses

6 01 2016
Timothy D. Naegele

A MESSAGE FROM THE QUEEN

Queen Elizabeth II

To the citizens of the United States of America from Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II:

In light of your failure in recent years to nominate competent candidates for President of the United States and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately.

(You might wish to look up “revocation” in the Oxford English Dictionary)

Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths, and territories (excluding North Dakota, which she does not fancy).

Your new Prime Minister, David Cameron, will appoint a Governor for America without need for further elections. Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire may be circulated next year to determine whether any of you have noticed this change.

To aid in the transition to a British Crown dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:

1. The letter “U” will be reinstated in words such as “color,” “favor,” “labor” and “neighbor.” Likewise, you will learn to spell “doughnut” without skipping half the letters; and the suffix “-ize” will be replaced by the suffix “-ise.”

Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to acceptable British levels.

(You might wish to look up “vocabulary” too)

2. Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such as “like” and “you know” is unacceptable and an inefficient form of communication. There is no such thing as U.S. English. We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take into account the reinstated letter “U” and the elimination of “-ize.”

3. July 4th will be celebrated as a holiday, but then so will this day.

4. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers, or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you are not quite ready to be independent. Guns should only be used for shooting grouse. If you cannot sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist, then you are not ready to shoot grouse.

5. Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous than a vegetable peeler. Although a permit will be required if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public.

6. All intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start driving on the left side with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables. Both roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour.

7. The former USA will adopt UK prices on petrol (which you have been calling “gasoline”) of roughly $10/US gallon. Get used to it and stop bitching.

8. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call “French fries” are not real chips; and those things you insist on calling “potato chips” are properly called crisps. Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal fat, and dressed not with “catsup” but with salt and vinegar.

9. The cold, tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer at all. Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to as “beer,” and some European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as “Lager.”

South African beer is also acceptable, as they are pound for pound the greatest sporting nation on the Earth and it can only be due to the beer. They are also part of the British Commonwealth.

10. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as good guys. Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to play English characters. Watching Andie MacDowell attempt English dialect in “Four Weddings and a Funeral” and Dick Van Dyke playing a “Cockney” in the film “Mary Poppins” were experiences akin to having one’s ears removed with a cheese grater covered in sulphuric acid.

11. You will cease playing American football. There is only one kind of proper football; you call it “soccer.” Those of you brave enough will, in due time, be allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American football, but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full Kevlar body armour like a bunch of nancies).

12. Further, you will stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the “World Series” for a game that is not played outside of America. Since only 2.1% of you are aware there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable. You will learn cricket, and we will let you face the South Africans first to take the sting out of their deliveries.

13. You must tell us who killed JFK. It has been driving us mad.

14. An internal revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty’s Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all monies due (since 1776).

15. Daily Tea Time begins promptly at 4 p.m. with proper cups, with saucers and never mugs, and shall be served with high quality biscuits (which you stupidly call “cookies”) and cakes; plus strawberries (with clotted cream) when in season.

God Save the Queen!

QEII and Prince Philip

Liked by 1 person

9 01 2016
Timothy D. Naegele

THE PHOTOGRAPHY OF SEAN PATRICK FLAHERTY

“Photography allows us to capture a moment in time . . . which never was before, and never will be again.”

Morro Bay
Sunset, Morro Bay, California

Flowers, Santa Monica, California
Flowers, Santa Monica, California

Ruin, American Canyon, Napa, California
Ruin, American Canyon, Napa, California

Palm Tree, Sonoma, California
Palm Tree, Sonoma, California

City Hall, Sonoma, California
City Hall, Sonoma, California


Sunset, Morro Bay, California

Ruin (in blue), American Canyon, Napa, California
Ruin (in blue), American Canyon, Napa, California

City Hall (in color), Sonoma, California
City Hall (in color), Sonoma, California


Sunset, Morro Bay, California

Orange Flower, California
Orange Flower, California

Santa Monica Pier, ferris wheel, smoke from fire
Santa Monica Pier, ferris wheel with minute orange sun, smoke from fire

Santa Monica Pier, with smoke from fire
Santa Monica Pier, with smoke from fire

Santa Monica Pier fireball
Santa Monica Pier fireball

Rushing water, Yosemite
Rushing water, Yosemite

Oaks, Yosemite
Oaks, Yosemite

Leaves, River, Yosemite
Leaves, River, Yosemite

Grass, River, Yosemite
Grass, River, Yosemite

Oaks, Leaves, Yosemite
Oaks, Leaves, Yosemite

See also https://www.instagram.com/spf_photography/

Copyright © 2015-2017, Sean Patrick Flaherty. All rights reserved.

Liked by 3 people

17 01 2016
smilinjacksez

The photos show a great appreciation of nature at its finest.

Liked by 1 person

16 02 2016
Timothy D. Naegele

Lady Gaga’s Tribute To David Bowie [UPDATED]


[58th GRAMMY awards, February 15, 2016]

Some might wonder why I would celebrate Lady Gaga’s tribute to David Bowie at the GRAMMYs.

I have been a “fan” of Elvis Presley, the Beatles, the Beach Boys, the Eagles, Rod Stewart, Celine Dion and more recently the Rolling Stones, out of sheer respect for the latter group’s longevity and survivability.

I believe Bowie was a unique creative talent, who seemingly found great happiness in the latter years of his life with his wife Iman and their young daughter.

Tony Bennett has teamed up with Lady Gaga and praised her talents; and I have liked and respected him for many years.

When I watched her tribute to Bowie, I was struck by its creativity. One landmark TV concert by Elvis from Hawaii stands out in my memory; and albeit Lady Gaga’s performance was shorter and less heralded, it had similar hallmarks of creativity and originality.

Yes, everyone may not agree; and some may even be repulsed by her performance. But just as I enjoy music by Bach, so too I believe there is enormous talent in other parts of the musical spectrum.

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1 04 2016
Timothy D. Naegele

THE PHOTOGRAPHY OF KIRSTEN ANN FLAHERTY


Yosemite Valley, March 2016

Copyright © 2016, Kirsten Ann Flaherty. All rights reserved.

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10 04 2016
Timothy D. Naegele

Naegele House, Malibu

Bill Turnbull
Designed by William Turnbull FAIA

Design Sketch
Turnbull Design Sketch

Perspective
Perspective

Floorplan-upper level
Floorplan, upper level

Construction
Construction

From beach
From beach

From air
From air

See also http://www.tgharchitects.com/aboutus/history/founder/ (“William Turnbull Jr.“) and https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/William_Turnbull,_Jr. (“William Turnbull, Jr.“)

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18 04 2016
Timothy D. Naegele

Mako Shark Eating Sailfish Off Miami

[Note: Even though this video has the message above, just click on the “Watch on Vimeo” button and watch it]

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18 04 2016
smilinjacksez

Keep going with Nature’s best…..

Liked by 1 person

18 04 2016
Timothy D. Naegele

Thank you, Smilin Jack.

How nice to hear from you. 🙂

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11 05 2016
Timothy D. Naegele

Chase Bank Commercial Walking Baby Pig

[Note: It is said that pigs make great pets. 🙂 ]

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22 05 2016
Timothy D. Naegele

Flying Fish Hunt

[Note: compliments of Smilin Jack]

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22 06 2016
Timothy D. Naegele

America’s Ford GT Wins At Le Mans 24 Hours [UPDATED]


[Ford executives—including Bill Ford, Executive Chairman of Ford Motor Company, and the great-grandson of Henry Ford—and the drivers of the Ford GT reflect on the GTE Pro class win Le Mans 24 Hours]

See http://performance.ford.com/series/ford-gt/news/articles/2016/06/ford-wins-le-mans–.html (“FORD WINS LE MANS!“); see also https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/William_Clay_Ford_Jr. (“William Clay Ford Jr.“) and Henry Ford III mid-race interview at 2016 Le Mans 24 Hour:



Bravo. Well done! 🙂

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11 08 2016
Timothy D. Naegele

Sarah Brightman and Andrea Bocelli – Time to Say Goodbye (Con te partiro)

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27 01 2017
Timothy D. Naegele

President Donald J. Trump and First Lady Melania Trump

President Donald J. Trump

The President and First Lady

President Trump

President and First Lady Trump

President Trump

Donald and Melania Trump

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27 01 2017
Rick

I love him so far… He’s gonna be legend.

Liked by 1 person

27 01 2017
Timothy D. Naegele

Thanks so much, Rick. I agree. 🙂

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